No Zombie for a Neighbor
Part One: Bad Water
I woke up that night to the sound of thunder. The rain did not bother me, but I did worry about it troubling the children. I thus got up to move about the house and listen for the sounds of others being disturbed by the storm.
The children continued to sleep, while I found myself amused by the zombies. The noise of the thunder caused the undead to react with some falling from the ground being slippery. Seeing the creatures jerk as another loud sound issued from the sky with a number going down I found funny, so I stayed up watching the show.
I rose from my chair upon seeing the lights go on around my mother’s house. I then heard the roar of an engine. I did not know who had the chainsaw, but I knew the noise. Wondering if it was my man, I picked up the phone and called my mother.
I felt good to hear Theo’s voice. “No, Livonia, it’s not me. It’s Sandra. We saw the chainsaw yesterday while working on the gate. I was thinking about it, as the thunder would help cover the noise. I however was worried about getting zombie juice on me and the rain spoiling my vision. Sandra put on your mother’s raincoat and a long coat, and went out saying that the chainsaw was a good weapon.”
“Just because it looks good on the movies does not mean that it is a good weapon. Skulls are rather tough.”
I believe that he was looking out the window as I was when he said, “She does not appear to be having an easy time of it. Still, it would be nice if she can reduce the number to something where we can consider adding support to our lines.”
“Yes, as we really do not have cluttered yards.”
“There are some bicycles, but that is about it. Probably going to have to use furniture. Maybe the frames of what beds we are not using along with some tables.”
I had to ask, “Speaking of beds…”
“Yes, I was alone on the couch like I told you I would be.” I then heard him whisper, “Are you naked?”
“No, as I have no one to be naked for. I don’t just go around in the nude. If you see me naked, I am doing it for you and not because I like walking around without clothes on.”
“Well, if you want me to do things for you.”
I probably should have told him that he was with my mother because he was doing things for me, but I instead decided not to get my man horny when he was around other women. “You have a nice body, Theo, but it could be exercised a little more. If we find a set of weights in one of these houses, claim it and use it.”
“It is something that I have thought about. Those are not easy to move however, so we need a clean street.”
Now I felt safe telling him something. “I am proud of you, Theo. My titties are here willing to bounce for you.”
“How are the children?”
I went into a little more detail than just saying that they were fine. I mentioned some of their antics and words about him. As I spoke, I did hear the door slam in the background, then my mother and Rita exclaimed something. While they didn’t sound frightened, I could tell that Theo was distracted by what they were saying. I thus accepted his words that he needed to go and check on the details of a situation.
I saw Sandra step back outside. They fussed about something, then Sandra began to strip. I had to assume that she had a lot of zombie pieces on her body from using the chainsaw. She could not spray herself down, because Theo had used the garden hoses in making the barriers. When the lady was down to her underwear, she was given a towel and allowed back into the house.
The phone rang. Truthfully, it better had rung, as I was worried. It was Theo, and I waited for him to speak.
“Sandra’s clothes were covered in zombie goop. She claims to have killed a good number however. We can check on the situation in the morning.”
“If she did, you can come across the street.” Another blast of thunder had me speak different. “Okay, I will wait until the morning.”
“Thanks, but I would have come. I believe that Sandra has zombie goop on the ground, and I would prefer not slipping and falling in it.”
“No, I don’t want you doing that either. Having you wet from the rain however did sound like something I want.”
“You are a very lovely lady, Livonia. I will have you for the rest of your life.”
I honestly wanted to get him to tell me what he thought of my naked body. I did try to keep it in shape, but certain parts, like my breasts, just could not be exercised. They were large, and I knew men liked them, but I just saw them as large floppy parts of my body. While all of the other men I had stated their appreciation of them, none really could say why they liked them. I however felt that my Theo, my going-to-become-a-doctor husband, could find the words to tell me things about my body that I wanted to hear.
“I am over here, Theo. Get some rest. There will be more work for you tomorrow.”
“With you in my life it is all play. Anyway, yes, I plan on having you again tomorrow.”
“And every tomorrow thereafter, Theo. Good night.”
I am glad that he hung up. Realizing that I was truly married did bother me. It was not a feeling of being trapped, but simply having a part of my life decided. I remembered waking up some mornings with a man knowing that I was going to drop him, and wondering who I would be sleeping with the coming night. That would no longer be the case. For the rest of my life it would be Theo or no one. It helped that he hung up, because it left the conversation again with me sealing my doom, and having to admit that it was a good one.
The sounds of the storm began to soothe me, and I drifted off to sleep on the couch. It really was not the best bed, so I awoke early. As I was considering whether to make coffee or get some more sleep in the bed, I heard a slam. Looking out the front window, I saw the men in the truck coming out.
I did not want to disturb the pizza guys, but I did step outside to watch them. Sandra must have gotten a good number of the undead last night, because very few moved about in our area. The two men saw me, and waved. They pointed to the house on the side of me, but I pointed across the street to let them know of another that had been watching them.
“It looks like you can make it to Annette. It is a good house, and one of you might get lucky. Just a sec.”
I got the phone, then dialed Annette. She was groggy, but when I told her about the pizza men she became alert. Soon, I saw her front door open with her waving for the pizza guys to come her way.
The two men traded words about making the drop to the ground. I had to admit that the water had a rather disturbing oily surface, but zombies did not disappear when one killed them. Problems of dealing with the corpses was a daily concern, and I looked to the water feeling that it would at least go away once the sun broke through the clouds. I thus only considered the men continuing to be foolish white men as I watched them decide how best to get to the ground.
One climbed down, but the other jumped. I laughed as his feet spread out with him falling belly first onto the pavement. He quickly got up as the other finished climbing down, then the two raced to Annette.
She also had the two strip. I figured that she simply wanted to look at their bodies, but I saw the heads of the men bob as if they agreed with her words. I thus looked again at the water, and went inside thinking to also have Theo strip when he came over.
“Do you have coffee ready?”
It was Theo on the steps outside my mother’s house. My head jerked around looking for zombies. There were a few, but I thought to compliment Sandra as I replied.
“About to put it on.”
He closed the door, then moved to the fence. He opened the gate in a strong manner to strike at a couple of zombies. One fell, but the other stayed standing until Theo sent my crowbar into its skull. He did not bother with the one on the ground, but as it tried to stand he closed the gate then moved to me.
I noticed that he walked carefully. He used his car to help him climb our fence instead of just jumping it. When he came close enough to share a kiss, he made a comment.
“I hope that the water drains off, as it is rather gross.”
There was indeed a layer of residue on his shoes. “We have been killing a lot of zombies. Still, it is nice not seeing a mass of zombies outside.”
“Yes. I want to check out that other house, then start looking for everything that can be used to support our ropes.”
He said some more things of that type while taking off his pants and shoes. He had me go inside to get some gloves to protect his hands. He mentioned taking a shower, and I told him that I would start the coffee then join him.
I was unbuttoning my shirt intending to have my titties bouncing when Theo saw me, but spun upon hearing a loud retort. I rushed to the window wondering who had a gun to use upon the zombies. The only ones that I could think of were the pizza men, and I suddenly felt worried about Annette when I heard the sound of another shot.
Fantasy puts more requirements on the writer than any other fiction, because the world must be made as real before anything else can be real.
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