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For this month's writing prompt write a scene using the following sentence to start;

The streets were deserted. Where was everyone? Where had they all gone?

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Our monthly writing tips are written by our very own TerishD. You can read more in Terish's Blog located in "The Abstractions" area of the forum.

Look Back

When not able to write ahead, it helps to look back. In my case I had written a paragraph ahead of the story. What I needed to do was add a section of exposition (talking) presenting some facts. In going back, I realized that I could insert a section where a 'tour' of the surroundings could be done. This allowed for character interaction, story development, and other things that enabled me to present the facts in an entertaining manner.

One should not face a writer's block with the mentality of bursting through it. I have found in my own experience that a writer's block is usually due to my mind indicating that it has a problem in 'channeling' the story. One reason might be a re-imagining of certain story points. Another reason however is that there is a problem in where you are at in the story, so you need to look back and find out the problem with the 'journey' that prevents the tale from advancing.

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 Living with Spirit Girl: Cp13

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Number of posts : 1316
Age : 59
Location : Ringgold, Louisiana
Current Mood :
Registration date : 2008-07-21

PostSubject: Living with Spirit Girl: Cp13   January 10th 2017, 9:55 pm

Living with Spirit Girl
Chapter Thirteen

After Blake went to sleep, I took over the body and headed back to the gym. This time I thought to bring a change of clothes and a towel. Fernando told me that he would be practicing every night until the match, but I still worried about things changing in his life. The lights of the gym were on however, and when I entered he called out my name.

“Arraelly! Girl, I have heard some things about you.”

“Not with my name, I hope.”

“No, not with your name, but I knew it was you. Father David and I were talking about you.”

I sat my clothes in a chair near where Fernando’s trainer stood. He assured me that they would be safe, and thanked me for coming back. I told him that I needed the practice as well, and looked to another chair where the protection devices were sat.

“Hey, Arraelly, did you hear that the gorilla got away?”

I was putting on the pads, but that did not keep me from talking. “Yes, I did. It means that my job is not over.”

Father David asked, “Did you speak with the police?”

“Yes, I did. Considering the story that I have to tell, I could not blame them for anything. I however am back to having to chase my quarry back down again.”

“Hey, Arraelly,” Fernando asked, “did that gorilla really shoot the other guys in the van?”

“Lorither is someone that someone like me exists to track down. He is evil, nothing but. What scares me more about him escaping is that he will not stop, but more people are going to die – probably not criminals.”

Father David’s soft voice said, “They killed the people at the bank.”

Before I climbed into the ring, I replied, “It is said that someone like him is why someone like me exists.”

“Make certain that I bless you before you leave.”

I knew something of religion. A belief in God did exist among my people. It however took a part of one’s life to adhere to a religion, and I spoke to let the priest know that I was not going to change how I lived.

“You can do what you like, Father David. I however will do what I must.”

“I want God to do what he must to have you succeed. I guess that I won’t be doing it for you, but for me and anyone else who should not face the evil you are facing.”

“Sounds good, Father David. If I asked for your blessing, that would be the reason.”

Fernando proved that he had been practicing against my moves. I considered that to only prove the man as determined to win. I did not have only one set of moves however, and Fernando proved that he other techniques as we set ourselves to sparring out the night.

Father David called time while it was still dark. When I mentioned still having time, he reminded me that he was a priest and occasionally had to act in that capacity. He said that he needed some time to rest and prepare himself before it was time for church.

After I stepped out of the ring, he gave a blessing then said, “I would like to see you there.”

“If Lorither was still in a cage, I would consider it. If Lorither was still in a cage, I would consider a lot of things. He’s not, however, so don’t expect me.”

“Well, I hope to keep hearing good things about you.”

“If you consider stopping bad guys to be a good thing, you always should.”

I was again taking a shower when I sensed Blake’s consciousness waking up, so I said, “You take back over this body and you will be drenched again.”

I sensed him move somewhere behind my eyes before I heard him say, “Okay, Arraelly, I can go back to sleep. Did you spend another night with Fernando Freight Train?”

“That I did.”

“Can you get tickets to his match?”

Honestly, he had invited me, but I spoke to let Blake know certain things about the way I worked. “I probably could, but I don’t do things like that. I cannot afford it. As long as Lorither is out there, I will stay on the case. Hopefully, I am making enough of an impression on him that when I finally am able to relax, I can get him to send me tickets to whatever match he has coming up.”

“Get me a ticket as well.”

“I’ll be glad to, Blake.” Since we were having a conversation, I decided to mention another point. “Oh, Father David invited me to church. Are you religious, Blake?”

“I never remember going, but when anyone asks my parents just say that they work. Mom is off today, but that is not usual.”

That was enough of the conversation for me. I finished washing myself, then told Blake that he could look as I went to get dressed. I honestly had no way of knowing if he did or not, except for his reactions. I was impressed that he did not do anything to take back over the body, and even surprised that he stayed awake to continue our conversation.

“Do you watch when I take my showers, Arraelly?”

I was about to lie, but went ahead and said the truth. “I knew nothing of human anatomy, Blake. Cannot say that learned much by watching, but I have.”

“How does it feel being a human girl?”

“It’s an experience, Blake. Just like getting to know you.”

He asked me about things with my present form and my actual body. I did my best to answer. It helped that he had seen my original form, so could actually identify some features I described. I also spoke of what clothes I had on to cover certain parts of me. I felt it was a good conversation for Blake, so did not stop him from asking about what things interested me.

I sensed the vehicle as I walked home. My first thought was that it was Conner, but it was the wrong type of car. His was big, but this one was low to the ground with a nice flow to the shape. Noticing that it did not alter its slow progress, I took a moment to look at it. I saw Honidder driving the vehicle. I then smiled as I went back to walking home.

“He doesn’t know this is me. Blake did you have the brooch on?”

“Yes, Arraelly.”

“But,” while I had just been naked and put on my clothes, I still stopped to assure my statement. “The brooch is not on me. Still, I am here. Whatever his device senses should thus find me.”

“That’s good, right? I mean that it does not sense you.”

“Yes, but we need to be certain of something. Listen, Blake, I am going to your house, but not in your house. Once going around to the back door, I am going to rush off down a side road, then I want you take back over your body.”

Blake proved that he was understanding my reasoning by saying, “Then you are going to want to change back?”

“Yes, but only to protect you. No, hold it, as that won’t help. That will just have them focus on this neighborhood like they did the school. No, Blake, I need you to stay me for a while.”

My mind was racing, but I quickly came to a decision. “No, I need you to take back over your body. I am going to return to your room first. Pull your brooch out however quickly and put it away. I am going to go as Spirit Girl and try to track him down.”

I took off running to Blake’s house. Wanting to put as much stuff between him and Honidder, which I considered a house to be a lot of stuff, I ran to the back. After setting down my clothes, and asking Blake to see that they were washed, I told him to take back his body and quickly remove the brooch. He did as I asked, putting the ornament in with my dirty clothes. Feeling that he would be all right, I concentrated on moving as fast as possible away from Blake’s house.

Honidder had stopped, so I suspected he had noticed the short signal from Blake and the brooch being together and physically real. I came upon Honidder however speaking on a phone. Feeling that I had actually managed to keep Blake safe, I moved up to the car hoping that Honidder would talk a little longer. His car did not have a back seat, and I found myself wondering how I could find a place to settle where I could also track the route he followed. Realizing that my insubstantiality could work to my advantage, I floated into the vehicle with most of my body in the trunk while my upper body rested in the space right behind the opening between the two seats. With him stopped, I found a position and while waiting listened to the conversation.

“Sorry, Honey. Really, no cry. Have other girl trouble. No – not wife.”

I could not help but wonder how long Honidder had been present on this world. While he did seem to have learned the language, his skills were clearly far from good. I could not help but wonder how he had managed to set up all that he had.

Some of my questions were answered when Honidder shut his phone. He griped and cursed in the language from our world in very clear descriptions. It seemed that the body he gained had a wife, family, and a number of other benefits. What I considered pleasant aspects of one’s life, Honidder seemed to think of as just being problems in the way of his personal goals.

It then caught me by surprise to hear, “*All right, Arraelly, where are you? We had a good haul, but you ruined it. No money, Lorither kills our men, and police raid my house. We cannot go further with you hounding us, so let us know where you are.*”

I think it would have been nice if he had turned around right then. While insubstantial, I could be seen. Without Blake present I could not be heard, and without him having possession of the brooch I could not add any substance to my form. I thus could thus simply have put fear into Honidder by having him see an apparition of me spying on him.

He suddenly had the vehicle accelerate. I tried to pay attention to turns and what noticeable sights came into view. The car barely slowed down as he made a series of turns, then I felt the car gain speed as he merged into traffic on a major thoroughfare.

I realized that I had a problem in that I could not read the signs. I did not even know the numbers. As I was attempting to gain some familiarity with which symbols were seen most often, I felt a rush come over me and I realized that Honidder had taken me beyond whatever limit I had to my movements.

Fantasy puts more requirements on the writer than any other fiction, because the world must be made as real before anything else can be real.
Adult Christian fiction quite different than all the usual lame stuff in that market.  "Dilemma of Dreams" now in hard back.
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