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 Writing Therapy

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Kellycakes


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PostSubject: Writing Therapy   October 4th 2008, 4:00 pm

I'm starting this thread with the intention to help our members who are battling their own form of depression. Its obvious that our younger writers are much like a lot of teenagers having issues with family, school or life in general, so we are here to listen, and maybe we can as older more experienced people offer some help.

I'm posting this in the 'Wellness Matters' area because depression has a lot to do with how well you live your life. Life isn't easy, but no body ever said it would be. So here is what you can do. Use writing as your therapy, it work greatly for me. From the ages of 16 to 28 I was lost in a depression so deep that I couldn't move on, I lost a lot during those years and if anything writing helped me come through with lessons I would not have otherwise learned. We need to work through our problems, to find the light of a new day.

I don't want to sound like a therapist or anything, I don't have any form of medical training, but I have lived and like a lot of what I'm reading I have been through some of the things that some of you have been through.

So this is like a daily emotion thread; write a poem, write a story, write a sentence or to telling us how you feel. We don't care, just write, and get it all out of your system because in all honesty the next thing is waiting just outside, ready to come in and attack you head on. Prepare yourself by letting go of the past and moving forward.

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PostSubject: Re: Writing Therapy   October 4th 2008, 7:52 pm

I think when it comes to mental health issues, especially in minors, we need to be very careful.

Not only because giving uneducated advice can sometimes cause more harm then good, but also because of possible illegal issues.

For example if someone post they are thinking about or planning suicide or are being physically, sexually, or even mentally abused, you (the board owners) and even we moderators could and likely do have some legal responsibility to report such posts to the proper local authorities.
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Urs


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PostSubject: Re: Writing Therapy   October 4th 2008, 10:49 pm

In regards to mental health issues and being victims of abuse, Rape Survival Forums are not required to contact anyone with the info presented, why should this forum?
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PostSubject: Re: Writing Therapy   October 4th 2008, 11:09 pm

Urs wrote:
In regards to mental health issues and being victims of abuse, Rape Survival Forums are not required to contact anyone with the info presented, why should this forum?

Rape victism, who are adults, have a right to choose not to report their rape. Plus, it's not usually an on going thing that worsens over time. Child abuse is normally an on going thing what gets worse over time. In other words, we are talking about the knowledge of on going criminal activity not a one time event. I really don't know what our legal obligation would be in a case such as this, but I think as adults we'd have a moral duty if not a legal one to get the minor some real life protection.

About suicide there is no argument. Suicide, or rather attempting suicide, is a crime in most states/countries and we'd have a legal obligation to report it just as we would if someone posted they were seriously planning to kill some other person. Now, of course, you'll be able to easily find people and websites that don't adhere to this rule, but I personally wouldn't want to open myself up to it.


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Urs


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PostSubject: Re: Writing Therapy   October 4th 2008, 11:48 pm

HYdraMStar wrote:
Rape victism, who are adults, have a right to choose not to report their rape. Plus, it's not usually an on going thing that worsens over time. Child abuse is normally an on going thing what gets worse over time. In other words, we are talking about the knowledge of on going criminal activity not a one time event. I really don't know what our legal obligation would be in a case such as this, but I think as adults we'd have a moral duty if not a legal one to get the minor some real life protection.

As far as I know Legal obligations are very sketchy in this case. Unless you can VALIDATE the abuse, with Proof, you can NOT make the claim (Ask schools and teachers about this one). last I checked a post on a message board forum do not constitute proof.

Quote :
About suicide there is no argument. Suicide, or rather attempting suicide, is a crime in most states/countries and we'd have a legal obligation to report it just as we would if someone posted they were seriously planning to kill some other person.

In the united States, as best as I could figure out unless you are a professional health official, with the individual in question being under your professional care or guidance, you have no official legal responsibility to report a suicide threat or a person mentioning feelings of being suicidal.

You might feel a moral obligation, but as far as I could tell, there are no legal ones.


Last edited by Urs on October 4th 2008, 11:56 pm; edited 1 time in total
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PostSubject: Re: Writing Therapy   October 4th 2008, 11:56 pm

Urs wrote:
Legal obligations are very sketchy in this case. Unless you can VALIDATE the abuse, with Proof, you can NOT make the claim (Ask schools and teachers about this one). last I checked a post on a message board forum do not constitute proof.

I'm sorry, I don't know who told you that, but it's crap. My mom was a teacher and they were expected to report any signs of abuse.

Really, I don't get why you'd, or anyone, would be against reporting abuse or suicide threats. I mean how are you going to feel if one of the people you know here kills themselves after telling you they were thinking about it. Or they get put in the hospital or killed by an abusive parent after telling you they were being abused. And all you did was type some kind well-meaning words.
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Urs


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PostSubject: Re: Writing Therapy   October 5th 2008, 12:47 am

HYdraMStar wrote:
Really, I don't get why you'd, or anyone, would be against reporting abuse or suicide threats.

I resent this implication.

I was simply stating the legal obligation to the best of my knowledge.
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PostSubject: Re: Writing Therapy   October 5th 2008, 1:21 am

HYdraMStar wrote:


Really, I don't get why you'd, or anyone, would be against reporting abuse or suicide threats. I mean how are you going to feel if one of the people you know here kills themselves after telling you they were thinking about it. Or they get put in the hospital or killed by an abusive parent after telling you they were being abused. And all you did was type some kind well-meaning words.
Sometimes they aren't suicide threats. I know when I am having a really really crappy day. I am talking about the darkest feeling I can feel.
I write poems about killing myself and never fulfill them out because when I write them it means I'm dead.
It means when I write poems or stories about suicide I make myself carry them out in the story.
I never act upon my darkest feeling I can feel.
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PostSubject: Re: Writing Therapy   October 5th 2008, 2:29 am

Quote :
I think when it comes to mental health issues, especially in minors, we need to be very careful.

Not only because giving uneducated advice can sometimes cause more harm then good, but also because of possible illegal issues.

I agree, but I'm not really here to offer advice because as I said I do not have any medical training. Well I do, but not in the areas that pertain to the mind. My offer of advice is from as I stated above 'older more experienced' members. What I'm trying to do is start a thread where people can post their pieces that help them cope. When we are depressed and we write things come out a bit different. Not to say 'oh you will be just fine or put the knife down.' I can't tell them that because I'm not trained to do so and will not do so, even if I'm asked to.

Don't get me wrong however; I do not think that threats of committing suicide or being abused by a parent or anyone else can just be dismissed with a story. But it can help to write out our pains. However; I would report any abuse that I feel needs to be reported and as far as legal actions no worries in this area I'm covered. (I'm covered, not to say anyone else who offers advice that does more harm than good is.)

The object of the thread is to post your dark and depressed pieces here only. So our boards won't be clouded with poems and story with titles such as: "My Wrists Bleed the Color of my Heart" or "Suicide is Easier then Life". Most times the titles are what tell the story and I don't want to read the dead.

We are NOT medical professional, doctors, therapists or cops, we are your forum family and we can't help you with these types of problems. We are offering comments or criticism on your writing and if you are looking for help, I'm sorry.

By the way I believe rape and suicide threats should be reported so that people can get the help they need. This of course is my opinion.

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PostSubject: Re: Writing Therapy   October 5th 2008, 4:00 am

Urs wrote:
HYdraMStar wrote:
Really, I don't get why you'd, or anyone, would be against reporting abuse or suicide threats.

I resent this implication.

I was simply stating the legal obligation to the best of my knowledge.

Well, I'm truly sorry. I know now that isn't your position. I'm just use to dealing with people who make arguments on the letter of the law and/or semantics because they oppose the subject at hand... I mean nearly every person I know is that way. Again sorry.


And to be clear I'm not one to overreact to any hint of suicidal thoughts. I'm not talking about poetry about suicide or stories about it. I'm talking about things more in the line of blog entries and, I hope we never see it, farewell letters in which the person makes it clear they are having SERIOUS thoughts or are laying plans to kill themselves... and if it's not a legal issue then maybe it is a moral one and we'll have to each decide where our morals lie with it.
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PostSubject: Re: Writing Therapy   October 5th 2008, 4:35 am

I agree, suicide, abuse and rape victims should be dealt with by contacting authorities. Like Hydra said, poems and stories shouldn't be a real worry but blog posts are.

Erm, don't look at me like that. I didn't say I was going to commit suicide. I was just thinking about how would it be if I did. But no, I am not giving any sign...Wink
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PostSubject: Re: Writing Therapy   October 5th 2008, 7:23 am

Okay, this has turned into a discussion thread about the thread, which is totally not what Kelly intended. And since it sort of my fault that it has, I'll be the one to try to get us back on track and write the first 'therapy' piece.


I hate myself for thinking of you

Story deleted for personal reasons.


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Bick


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PostSubject: Re: Writing Therapy   October 5th 2008, 10:22 am

You work hard to bring the money home but at the end of the day donít you get to relax? Donít you get to bitch at me because thatís all you really do. Iím working hard to change what Iíve become. Harder then Iíve ever worked. I go to school 6-9 hours a day mother. I only have 3-4 hours of class. I WORK hard. I couldnít have said that before. I know you were disappointed in me before, hell. So was I. But how have I not showed you Iím a changed person?

Why canít you give me a break? Why canít you stop pushing me? Why canít you leave the whole ďdaddy doesnít love meĒ thing be? Why canít you stop talking about it and bringing up his little whore?

You are adding to my self-induced stress. YOU are making me feel like I canít do anything right.

I ask you now, will you still bitch at me once I get that job? Iíll be taking 8+ hours 3-4 days a week of MY free time that I really needed before whether it was for me to relax and calm down or for homework. I'm doing this for you, whether I try and push it off as doing it for myself. I donít need the money, I donít want the money and I honestly donít think I can mentally manage all of this at once.

You want to see my list? Before I even go to school, I get up early to make sure all homework is taken care of. Guess what happens if itís not? I go to school early. I work for 3 straight hours and I get my work done. Guess what happens then? I go to class, depending on the day this can take 3-4 hours of my time. Does it end there mother? No. I stay after school to make sure either the newsletter or something important is done. I even stay after in case there are students from my program that need help. Sometimes I get to school at 9am and I leave at 6. That entire time am I screwing off like I use to? No. That entire time am I working hard? Yes. Otherwise I couldnít be happy with myself. Just so you know, unless you canít count dear mother and I know youíre the math genius and Iím definitely not, thatís around 10 hours. Thatís not including some of the other work that I need to get done on the side. Thatís not including the time I donít spend sleeping when I should be because I canít stop waking up every few hours. Iíve come to realize half those time I was crying. Iím not even sure why myself. Iím not unhappy. Iím happy to be where I am. Iím happy to think of myself as successful. Iím going towards a goal and I CAN make it.

But here I am, stressed. Thatís my only answer to this little problem.

Do you think I can handle a job on top of school? I honestly donít think I can and can you believe out of all of this my mind is actually going towards other things. Iíll have an even smaller social life, but thatís the chance I took when I got into this program. I havenít seen my friends in two weeks mother. I havenít even seen them this weekend, you know why? Because they do family things on weekends mother. I sleep during my weekends or at least I try. Not to mention for the time being they are my only friends out of school. You know why mother? Because Iíve had to abandon just about all of my friends. I never mentioned this because it hurts me to even think about it. I had to abandon my friends because they would only pull me back. I canít be around drug-deals, users and addicts. I canít do that anymore and if I stayed around them would I be what Iím becoming now?

Iím four months+ clean, not that you know that. Iíve even stopped the self-abuse that I use to endure. I even quit smoking, mother dearest. Do you have any idea how big just one of those are? Do you understand the mental strain and physical strain that causes? Obviously not, because you never knew about most of it.

Through all this I have to deal with your bullshit. YES. Youíre bullshit. I understand you canít control my father, but honestly. Why couldnít you have found the balls to call this divorce yourself? You talked about it for years and then finally he goes and does it. It would have been on your turf not HIS!

So thanks to both of you I have to deal with a whipped father who is letting this Cougar bitch run him dry so he canít provide for his family. I have a father I canít even call without dealing with her. Do I even have a father anymore? I havenít seen him on good terms in at least 8 months.

Yet, you keep bringing it up. You bring out my faults while at the same time telling me how good Iím doing? Maybe I need those faults. Maybe I need to work on those faults mother dearest, but one fucking step at a time woman.

I think out of all of this. Iíve gotten two big things out of this. Iíve got self-worth. Youíre not going to have to rush me to the hospital ever again because I over-dosed purposefully or sliced my wrists. I couldnít dream of even doing that now. I see that my life is worth something now. I do have a future.

Have you noticed my confidence? Iíve never had confidence, ever. Itís an alien feeling to be able to stand up in class and debateóand Iím not afraid! I donít stutter. I donít flip over my words. My speech has become flawless, and it goes around the entire room. Eyes are on me now. People depend on me now when they need help with workÖ and actually with the computer. (Word/Excel/Power Point mind you. Phew, thank god for that computer class, right?)

Yet you canít help but see my faults. You look past my efforts but at the same time you see what I accomplishments and you ask for more? Letís change places, bodies and mindsets and letís see how long you last in my situation.

-Angela
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PostSubject: Blowing off Steam.   October 17th 2008, 7:11 pm

you know... some days you just have "'One of those days" or you are just dealing with "One of those People" and by the end of the whole thing you just need to find some way to let it out and get it out of your system.

We all know holding on to anger and frustration and things like that is not good for you, so that is what this topic is for.

To get it out of your system, just let the words go out and vent it.

Warning, this Topic will/might Contain:


Strong Language, Adult Situations, implied Acts of Violence, Violence, and a whole lot of just really un-nice things being said.

Do enjoy.

Mister Urs.
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Urs


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PostSubject: Re: Writing Therapy   October 17th 2008, 7:39 pm

I am going to start.
Ok, get this right. My wifeís dad, my in-law by default, Tony has borrowed over 10 grand from us, two years ago. And since he borrowed the money he has not paid back a single cent of it.

As a matter of fact all I hear from his now is about how he is broke and things like that like he is hitting up his own daughter for money.

I mean I could care less how broke he is, whatever, I stopped caring when the return payment was not received.

But what blows my mind is this whole, ďWhat the Hell?Ē that I get when he tries this crap.
Does he really think I am going to give him MORE money.
Yah.. congas you suckered me out a good deal of money, so much so that I had to take a loan out from my mom just to survive.

This guy is a winner and he has the audacity to lay guilt trips in my wife as well about she is ďself servingĒ because he took our money and she is not happy about it. Now I suppose I should kick myself in my own ass for not getting things written down, and recording every bloody cent I gave them, but my wife gave them money to help them with the bills and things like that and did not tell me. They basically laid a guilt trip on her to force her into giving them our saved up money.

And get this, now today, after yesterday my wife finally told him she was pissed. Gods how I wanted to tell Tony where he could shove it, how deep he could shove and just exactly how hard he shove it. But my wife kept stopping me, telling me she would handle it, it is her dad after all.

Anyway, he sends me an E-mail going ďI just now realized that I may have hurt your feelings and you are angry with meĒ

No shit jackass, you think people might get a little pissed at you when you rip them off for money especially when you do it under the disguise of being ďfamily LoanĒ and they you will pay it back under Good Faith.

Good faith my ass!

Ok I was a dingbat on this one, but what the hell? Is this fucking real? That he did not get the idea that ďHey you cheated me out of 10 grand, guess what, I am going to tell you to go screw yourself in futureĒ

And get this, he is supposedly running a ministry to help people find Christ.
You heard me, he runs a ministry to preach the gospel to people, a guy that just short changed his own family for a massive lump of money is going to tell you how to live a good, moral, righteous life with faith in God and Jesus.

This is so profane to me I want to puke just thinking about it.

Good god, I swear Atheist and other religious people really need to just sit quietly in the corner, smile and wave, and keep your word, because ďChristiansĒ like this guy are gonna do more damage to anyoneís faith then any of you could hope to accomplish.

I am sure that this is the exact type of crap that makes people just hate Christians and for the longest time I did not understand why, it took a Missionary to show me why. Go figure.

I am just so pissed right now. And he ended the E-mail with ďI love you and am praying for youĒ

Great, just great, well first off you can shit can the love line, itís bogus bullshit to put it mildly, you canít love someone you just created out of money. When I sold my home I wrote a check to my mother to pay her back what I owed her.

That is why she loaned me more money, you donít double hand the people you claim to ďLoveĒ unless you have no damn clue what the heck love is.

And they are praying for me. Well holy shit, if God is real and he is listening to people like this, something is very wrong someplace in the whole freaking cosmic scheme of things.

I am just so pissed right now, I need to get this out, there is a ton of other things that are pissing me off about this whole thing, but it would take a novel to explain it all.

I feel slightly better nowÖ to tell the truth.
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